therapy

Mental Health

What I Think the Therapeutic Relationship is Trying to Tell Me

I have recurring therapy dreams where I go to an appointment and other people are in the room during what should be my time. I’m angry because she should know better. I’m hurt that she doesn’t care enough about me to give me one hour of her life. During the dream, I feel a twisting countdown as I watch the clock, hyperaware of every passing second that I won’t get back. I want to express my feelings but feel helpless to do so. There’s even part of me that feels relief to have one of my deepest fears confirmed. To not have to worry about it anymore.

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Randomness

A (Lightly Edited) Email to My Therapist

I have mixed feelings about emailing my therapist. But I can say for sure that I’d be a very different version of myself if she didn’t allow me to express myself through writing. Sometimes it’s philosophical and intellectual musings. Sometimes it’s a funny meme that accurately sums up something we have been talking about. But sometimes it’s a dive into my brain with no Coast-Guard-approved life vest.

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