#TBT – That time I gave Willie Nelson an enema
I used to be a veterinary assistant.
I snuggled puppies, put kitten on my shoulders, and got lots of licks and kisses from sweet dogs.
#TBT
#TBT – The construction
I wrote this a year and a half ago during some major construction going on outside of my office.
My apologies to Poe.
#TBT – HOSPITAL EDITION
Rowan’s hospital visit had me reminiscing about my own three-day stay when I was six years old. I don’t really recall the breathing difficulties that landed me there – it blends in with so many other episodes in those years. But I remember quite a bit from the hospital.
#TBT – The House that Awkward Built
I can only assume that the person who designed the house was drunk. Or made a Sims house into reality. That would explain the lock on the outside of my bedroom door, the better to watch me starve with increasingly panicked thought bubbles floating above my head.
#TBT – Unreliable narrator
It is frankly astonishing that child protective services never showed up at my front door to question my parents.
#TBT – tornadoes
Saying I love weather is like saying I love breathing, it’s part of who I am, and has been for as long as I can remember. There is a home video from Christmas ’89 where I am playing in the snow, making snowballs, and generally being a kid – then I suddenly look up at the camera and with the authority of a meteorologist I state, “this is the first white Christmas in New Bern since 1898.” Then I go back to playing.
#TBT – This is why we can’t have mediocre things
Our first Christmas living off campus, Steven, Anelle, and I bought a Christmas tree. Like real adults. And we probably drank hot chocolate spiked with rum while we decorated it. Like real adults. Maybe it snowed. It was super Norman Rockwellian. Our only ornaments were whatever was on clearance at Lowe’s and things we made, but it was our tree and we were proud of it.